“There is no such thing as a hopeless situation. Every single circumstance of your life can change.” – Ritu Ghatourey
I have had plenty of uncertain times in my life.
There were times where things were a mess, and I didn’t know what to do. Most recently was when I was 57 years old I lost my job, then my mom died 3 days later. My kids were grown and I became an empty nester. I gained a lot of weight and a couple of years later I was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease. Not a good time for me.
To say I was lost was an understatement of epic proportions.
It was a depressing time for me, and it took months for me to snap out of it. I think the catalyst was that I realized I could change how I approached getting older. So I took steps to change my mindset around my thoughts of – “is my life now on a downward spiral? And slowly but surely things turned around.
Reject the societal narrative surrounding older women!
“We live in a youth-obsessed culture that is constantly trying to tell us that if we are not young, and we’re not glowing, and we’re not hot, that we don’t matter. I refuse to let a system or a culture or a distorted view of reality tell me that I don’t matter. I know that only by owning who and what you are can you start to step into the fullness of life. Every year should be teaching us all something valuable. Whether you get the lesson is really up to you.” – Oprah Winfrey
Society perpetuates the notion that women over 50 are diminished in value.
This leads to feeling unseen and unimportant in the eyes of the world. It is evident that media consistently emphasizes the superiority of youth.
In my Facebook group titled For Women Over 50, numerous members share their experiences of feeling like outsiders, observing life from a distance. A prevailing sense of loneliness and a void in terms of purpose and direction deeply affect their overall sense of well-being.
Similar to how you have the capacity to mold your own life, you also hold the authority to craft your own story.
Embrace and rejoice in your unique identity, acknowledging the particular phase of life you presently inhabit. It is important to recognize that women of our age comprise a significant portion of the population, a collective that should demand attention from both politicians and marketers. We are a formidable force!
Avoid being critical of yourself.
“We all have the tendency to believe self-doubt and self-criticism, but listening to this voice never gets us closer to our goals. Instead, try on the point of view of a mentor or good friend who believes in you, wants the best for you, and will encourage you when you feel discouraged.” – Kelly McGonigal
Treat yourself with the same kindness and compassion that you would extend to a friend.
If you notice a friend feeling down, you would likely offer them gentle words of encouragement and support, right? Apply that same nurturing and positive mindset to yourself. Engage in self-talk that mirrors the way you would talk to a friend in need.
Consider giving yourself a personal goal or task to tackle.
It’s common to feel discouraged or stagnant without a sense of progress. By taking up a challenge, even if it is something minor, it can greatly benefit us. Personally, my challenge for this year was to shed weight, and I’ve successfully lost 34 pounds so far. Only 9 pounds remain until I reach my desired weight. Although it was a difficult journey, I firmly believe that extraordinary things occur when we step outside our comfort zone.
Count your blessings
“There is something to appreciate in every moment of every day. Strive to find it as often as you can. Living with gratitude will change your life.” – Anthon St. Maarten
Creating a gratitude journal can be a powerful tool to cultivate a positive mindset and appreciate the abundance in our lives, even in the smallest of things. By taking the time to write down the things we are grateful for, including the basic necessities like having enough food to eat, we shift our focus towards the positive aspects of our existence. It allows us to acknowledge and cherish the simple blessings that we often take for granted.
Through this practice, we develop a greater sense of gratitude, which in turn brings about a deeper appreciation for life’s everyday blessings. Whether it’s the comforting feeling of a warm meal or the nourishment it provides, recognizing and expressing gratitude for these small joys can have a profound impact on our overall well-being and contentment.
Don’t underestimate the healing power of nature, the ocean, and the stars.
“A walk in nature walks the soul back home.” –Mary Davis
It’s important to be aware that staying in one place for extended periods can easily lead to dwelling on negative emotions.
Although emotions are fleeting, remaining in one location increases the likelihood of getting stuck in a negative mindset and being consumed by your feelings. Even during times when you feel lost, stepping outside and engaging in physical activity can offer the inspiration you seek. The power of fresh air has a transformative effect on individuals. Simple actions like getting out of bed and taking a shower can also contribute to a slight improvement in managing your emotions.
If possible, consider going on a short break or vacation.
You don’t have to go on an extravagant trip or board a plane to experience a mental boost. A weekend getaway to a cottage destination, a popular tourist spot, or a peaceful hike in the forest can provide the opportunity to recharge and rejuvenate.
Life is meant to be actively lived in the world around us. Therefore, when you find yourself overwhelmed by thoughts, venture into nature and embrace your surroundings. Immerse yourself in the beauty of the sights, sounds, and scents that encompass you.
“You’ll never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine.” -JOHN C. MAXWELL
Change your habits to promote a healthier lifestyle.
This might seem like a cliché, but the truth is that our habits play a significant role in shaping our lives.
If you find yourself engaging in unhealthy habits, such as mindlessly scrolling through social media, it’s essential to reassess and make positive changes. Personally, I have a hidden addiction to playing Free Cell solitaire on my laptop, wasting hours that could be better spent. These mindless habits can contribute to a sense of being lost in life, particularly when they dominate our routines.
For instance, excessive use of social media isn’t inherently detrimental, but when it leads to constant comparison with others, it becomes unhealthy. It’s crucial to find a balance and practice moderation in all aspects of life, including our habits. By choosing healthier habits and reducing the influence of destructive ones, we can create a more fulfilling and purposeful life.
Take decisive steps to combat the overwhelming sensation of being adrift.
“We generate fears when we sit. We overcome them by action.” –Dr. Henry Link
It’s time to take proactive steps towards moving forward.
While feeling lost is something we must acknowledge for the moment, we also need to prepare ourselves for progress. Merely dwelling on this feeling won’t help us deal with it effectively. Feeling lost is a common experience in life, but what truly matters is how we choose to address this sentiment. If we feel lost because we are unsure about our chosen career path, it’s crucial to ask ourselves if we are actively taking steps towards achieving the career we truly desire. It’s time to stop making excuses and confront the underlying reasons behind our emotions.
One way to take action and move towards the next phase is by practicing meditation.
Through meditation, we can learn to redirect our focus away from wandering thoughts that often lead us astray. Meditation serves as a foundation for living mindfully. As we embrace mindful living, we will gradually notice negative experiences fading away. Instead of dwelling on the past or fearing the future, we will learn to live in the present moment. In the present, we are not lost, scared, or confused. Our energies are devoted to living, loving, and aiding others.
The enhancement in our lifespan and overall well-being is undoubtedly evident. In actuality, a substantial portion of our existence is dedicated to the years beyond 50, forcing us to explore means of remaining engaged in the world.
Regardless of whether we opt for fulfilling the role of a dynamic grandmother, engaging in philanthropic endeavors, or embarking on entrepreneurial ventures, an abundance of options awaits our embrace.
In conclusion, getting older does not need to mean giving in to inertia.
When we were younger taking action and staying active were the norm. Now its time to make sure that we don’t forget how its done!
Living is an action verb.
It is so much more than just “staying alive”.
And it doesn’t matter if you’re four years old or 84 years old – you can and should make the absolute most of every day your blessed with.
